Maybe you are thinking to yourself, “So, why a book about not wanting kids?” Without giving too much of the forward to the book away, it’s something funny I have been wanting to do for a long time. Believe it or not, as a teenager I had a (very) brief moment of thinking I wanted to have 15 kids (8 boys and 7 girls – you know, because boys are “easier”). It was definitely a fleeting moment!
After many years of babysitting for other people’s children I realized that kids were not for me! My fate was sealed in 2003 when at the age of 33 I had to undergo a hysterectomy. So even if I ever met “Mr. Right” and thought I’d change my mind about kids that wasn’t going to happen (at least naturally, anyway). We all know the saying “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” I set out to make light of my situation and find whatever way possible to make the prospect of not having children a lighthearted and funny topic. Whenever I would see a post about a child getting peanut butter from one end of the house to the other I would jokingly say “Reason #4,279 that I don’t have kids.” And, that has been my “thing” ever since!
I know, however, that it predates my hysterectomy as I used to make comments all the time about kids with messy hands, how kids are like dogs/cats and always try to get the attention of the person who doesn’t “like” them. The truth is – kids LOVE me! I mean, they really do. I have never met a kid that hasn’t liked/loved me. It’s a curse!
When I moved to the south in 1998 I quickly discovered that southern women don’t take lightly to girls not producing grandbabies for their mamas. It was like I had a disease when I would explain that I had ZERO (and I mean zero!!) desire to have children. I believe that many a tear was shed by some of the most southern of southern ladies when I made my proclamation! This furthered my protest against having them!
For years I would jot down my various reasons to not have kids, and from time to time I would think about what it would take to get this book published. After working on a collaborative book in 2014, it spurred me to really think seriously about it. The 20 Project was a collaboration of authors over the age of 20, writing to provide advice, guidance, personal stories for 20-somethings from the other side of 20. When thinking of advice – the quote I live by is “Never, never, never quit!” ~Winston Churchill
With that as a motto of mine, I feel I must listen to my own advice and not give up on my dream of getting this book published!
5/8/23 – moved from website SayNoToKids.com
